Edinsburgh
by NigelTux
Summary: Humanized! What really happened between two Arch-Nenemsis in their brief encounter at Edinsburgh.
1. Chapter 1

It all started in a local tavern called тайно следить сердце, or better know as The Shadow Heart. The Shadow Heart was a neutral tavern, that didn't care who you were or what you did as long as you left all those titles and fights outside it's doors. It was a popular place for villains to go and one of Red's favorite places to drink away his troubles.

He was in the middle of doing so when an all too familiar man sat next to him at the bar. White hair,emerald eyes and dressed to impress In an emerald and black suit with a grey jacket, Super Secret Agent Nigel smiled at him.

"Is this seat taken?"

Red scowled into his glass of vodka, as the spy sat down without waiting for an answer. His scowl only grew when the spy ordered a glass of tea with lemon. Seeing the look the Bartender- Jack- was giving the older man Red decided to speak up and save them all a headache and a half.

"Just give him a glass of whiskey, Jack."

Jack gave a brief nod and had a glass of whiskey and it's bottle in front of the spy in seconds before moving on to the next customer. Red, himself, went back to trying to ignore the spy. Sadly, Fate and Nigel- mostly Nigel- wasn't having it.

Red could feel his annoyance growing as the British spy kept invading his personal space until it was at the point of where the spy was hanging over his shoulder like a cloak. Damn Lightweight, one bottle of whiskey and the spy was completely wasted. Red's scowl grew as a hand slipped inside his coat and ran over his shirt. His eye twitched as it went a Little too low for his taste.

Crash!

Red ignored the looks he briefly received as he stood over the down spy, his broken bottle grip tightly in his hand. He tossed his shattered bottle into the nearby trash can, mumbling to himself about having to waste perfectly good vodka on the spy before sitting back in his stool and ordering another bottle, while using Nigel's limp form as a footstool.

It was around Midnight when Red finally left The Shadow Heart, supporting an unconscious Nigel through the streets and to is hotel room. He had half a mind to put the spy in some dirty alley and leave him there but another part of Red's mind told him the least he could do for the spy was insure he had a place to sleep for the night and since everything else was closed, Red figured he could dump the spy on his couch or something. He ignored the brief looks he got as he half carried half dragged the heavier man into his room.

Uncaringly he tossed the spy onto his couch and headed for the shower.

All it took was a quick hot shower and a change of clothes for Red to feel a lot better. At least to the point of where the world wasn't treating to tip on its side and take him with it. Grabbing a spare cover from the hallway closet, Red went to cover up the spy.

Only to find the couch deserted.

Instantly, every instinct Red gad was on alert. He was just about to start looking for the Super Secret Agent when something pressed against the back of his head and a soft Click filled the air.

Red froze on the spot, recognizing the sound for what it was, the hammer of a gun being pulled back.

"Drop the cover... Hic... and put your...Hic... hands where I can...Hic...see them, Red."

Great, the drunkard had a gun. Why the hell didn't he check Nigel for a weapon before getting a shower? Mentally cursing his lapse of good judgement, Red let the cover fall to his feet and raised his hands so Nigel could see them. The last thing he needed or wanted was for the drunk spy to blow any holes in him.

"Good."

Nigel's voice was slurred but at least he hand stopped hiccuping.

" Hands behind...your back, Red. Palms...facing me. "

Scowling the Russian did as told, making a mental note to next time he had an unconscious Nigel loaded on him he would drop the older man into the sewer system. he felt the cold metal of handcuffs tighten painfully around his wrists before the gun was taken from the back of his head.

Hands firmly gripped the handcuffs chain before Red found himself being led into the back room by a slightly stumbling spy, who was softly giggling to himself about something or another.

* * *

><p>The back room was actually Red's bedroom. The room itself was scarcely decorated; a few items here and there, a couple of suits and a trench coat in the closet. Crimson sheets on the bed was black pillows. All and all it was quiet a modest room but it was perfect for Red. His favorite part about the room had been the view of a nearby snow covered forest that was clear as day from the room's only window.<p>

"You know, I never...figured you to be...the modest type."

Red rolled his eye at Nigel's obvious disappointment. Clearly the spy had expected more but Red liked his current home the way it. He really didn't care about Nigel's obvious expectations. He liked it like this as it reminded him of home.

"It's a good thing your opinion doesn't matter then."

"It doesn't?"

Even though he knew Nigel couldn't see, Red gave the spy his best serious look and spoke firmly.

"No."

The Russian swore he could see the pout he heard in Nigel's voice.

"Do you always have to be so cruel to me? Would it kill you to be nice for a change?"

Red's eye twitched. Nice? He had been nice when he brought Nigel here and now look where it got him.

"Sit."

Nigel gestured to the bed but the Russian stayed on his feet. His lone eye never leaving the gun pointed in his face.

"I'd rather stand."

Slightly clouded emerald eyes stared at him in disbelief, but Red didn't care. It was bad enough he had been caught by a drunk in his current home. There was no way his pride would survive listening to orders like a well trained puppy.

"I've got a load gun in your face."

Nigel pointed out causing Red to roll his eye.

"So?"

Nigel's disbelief grew and Red was tempted to laugh at the look the older man was giving him.

"I could shot you."

"Thank you, Captain Obvious. It's not like I would have ever figured that out if you hadn't pointed it out."

Nigel's eyes narrowed, picking up on Red's obvious sarcasm. With an frustrated huff the Spy pushed the Russian onto the bed, only for Red to be up and standing a moment later. So he pushed the villain down again but yet again Red was on his feet in a matter of seconds.

After a few more times, Nigel had enough and tackled the Russian villain to the bed, using his superior weight to keep the younger man down.

"You get up again and I'll shot you."

Red just huffed in annoyance, but stayed down causing Nigel to give a relieved sigh.

* * *

><p>Nigel it turned out cuddled in his sleep and Red, unfortunately, was the only thing nearby for the spy to cuddle with. Red had tried moving away from the spy multiple times but the older man had a death grip on the Russian villain, refusing to lose his source of warmth. If that wasn't bad enough, Nigel apparently suffered from a case of Wondering Hands. Red tried to ignore it but the moment a hand tried dipping past his pants-line Red had officially had enough. A strong kick sent Nigel tumbling off the bed and to the floor when only seconds later a low groan came from.<p>

Emerald eyes locked on Red as Nigel pulled himself off the floor.

"What was that for?"

Red's eye twitched and if he could have, Red would have strangled the older man then and there.

* * *

><p>Turns out waking up Nigel wasn't such a good idea, especially when he realized who had the upper hand. With a smirk and emerald eyes ablaze, Nigel closed in on the vernalable villain.<p>

* * *

><p>Please, review to tell me how many think there should be another chapter or do you want to to leave the rest untold. The one with the most vote, including PMs, will be the winner and decided if the story continues.<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

Nigel couldn't help but softly chuckle as he watched his arch nemesis' face heat up in both shame and need at his teasing. He didn't see why the Russian was so ashamed though as desire was a part of every creature's nature and if pain and helplessness brought that desire out...

Well, Nigel would be more than happy to assist the younger man. He dug his nails into the villain's shoulder before proceeding to drag them down the younger's scared hairless chest just hard enough to drawl a little amused grin grew as the younger withered underneath him in a mixture of pain and unwanted pleasure.

* * *

><p>It was official Red thought wirily, his body was a Traitor. He knew desire was a natural part of nature but for Nigel?<p>

Hell no.

That was not natural no matter how much he drunk or how fuzzy his mind was. It seemed as though his body didn't get the memo as it slowly melted under the spy's skilled hands.

Hands that Red fully intended to cut off the first chance he got.

* * *

><p>Nigel grinned as the Russian finally melted completely, his face flushed a lovely shade of crimson in both shame and embarrassment. No doubt caused by the lovely noise that the younger had made only moments ago. It had been brief and soft, but the spy had heard it as clear as the Midday Bell.<p>

"Did you just moan?"

He resisted the urge to laugh as the Russian frantically denied in embarrassment. It was adorable in all honestly, like a child with their hand caught in a cookie jar yet still trying to play innocent.

"You did."

His answer was a few choice words about him, his parents, and his heritage that had the spy laughing at how defensive the younger was.

* * *

><p>Red felt as if his insides were on fire. Technically, it wasn't a bad thing as it was a fire he had experienced a long time ago with a woman he once knew called Susan. It was a fire caused by pure desire, a fire he had sworn to never feel again after his wife had been murdered so long ago. Yet here he was, pinned under the one man who was the cause of a lot of his headaches and sleepless night, with that cursed fire burning like an inferno once more.<p>

To put it simply he didn't like it in the least, or at least that's what he kept telling himself. His stubborn pride refused to allow him to surrender to the older man, instead it had him snarling and cursing the spy as if the man was the devil himself. Still it didn't seem to bother Nigel as the spy only kept smiling as he worked on helping that fire grow.

He hated this. He hated it. He hated Nigel and cursed him to the deepest pits of Hell. At least that's what Red told himself.

* * *

><p>If someone had told Nigel that he would one day bed Penguin Enemy Number One...<p>

Well, he would have called them insane then asked for details.

Ever since he had met the Russian he had been attracted to the younger so it wasn't exactly impossible yet Red was quiet firm on keeping everyone out of his bed and trusted few to none to share a bed with them. The only exception to that had been a woman named Susan that Red had, much to everyone's surprised, married when he was younger. It was ironic really seeing as Susan was the Daughter of the Old Quartermaster and one of the most law abiding people Nigel had known. For a time she had calmed the ruthless villain, some even dared to say she had tamed the Untamable. But then, it all changed and Red returned to his old ways.

Though Nigel personally couldn't blame the Russian. He no doubt would have done the same had someone murdered his wife and unborn child. Still Nigel had his orders, he was to either bring in the villain or kill him. At first he had intended to do as ordered but then that old flame had come back stronger then before and neither seemed like an option anymore. So he came up with his own options, he would chase Red, he would escort Red to prison if necessary but if he could, he would try to do as Susan had done.

He couldn't give Red a child but he could love the younger and maybe with time that love would be enough for Red to give up his current life and settle down once again, but this time with him. He knew the chances were slim but he was determined to one day see it done.

* * *

><p>Red silently listened to the order's heartbeat as he used the man for a pillow and tried to ignore the hand smoothing his hair.<p>

_"I hate you."_

The smooth voice cut through the silence with a calm undertone as if talking about the weather causing Nigel to smile softly as he chuckled.

"I know."

A lone golden eye met emerald jewels.

_"Then why do you keep bothering me?"_

Nigel smiled as he continued to smooth the others hair.

"I want to save you."

It was such a simple answer, as if it was so easy. Red scowled.

_"You can't save someone like me, Nigel."_

You couldn't save someone who didn't want to be saved, even Red knew that.

"I can try."

_"You'll die trying."_

"It would be worth it."

Red sighed as he rested his head back on the order's chest. He wasn't arguing this with the spy right now, he was far too tired to spend hours running himself in circles over the matter.

_"I hate you."_

Nigel smiled as the other slowly drifted into sleep.

"I love you too."


End file.
